Small town, old church(es), world renowned, famous wine growing area.
The this spectator reads the following:
When the city celebrated its anniversary (“Speyer after 2000 years”) in 1990, the Hotel and Restaurant Association with its partner organizations sponsored the first „Emperor’s Table“. What was initially intended as a contribution to the anniversary celebration, soon developed into an institution and dropping it as a cultural happening for the city of Speyer is now out of the question. The origin of the Emperor’s Table reflects the history of the Salian-Staufen Palatinate. It dates back to the imperial storehouses of the Staufen emperor, Conrad the Third (middle of the 12th century), when over 100 warriors in imperial pay had to be fed “by decree”.
Several thousand people visit the Emperor’s Table annually. Under the motto, “the art of cooking, wine culture, and Speyer’s way of life”, participants take their place at the long tablecloth-covered table with a view toward the cathedral in one direction and the old city gate in the other. In this unique historic setting, they then enjoy the very best that kitchen and wine cellar have to offer.
(from here
So, let me tell you what this culinaric highlight looks like:
The "emperors table" is a row of the following tables
.These tables are located in the middle of the pedestrian zone in front of the cathedral to a former town fortification tower, the Altpörtel. Located in direct sunlight.
When eating, its like living in a goldfish bowl. Ugly, fat people passing you, watching your plate as if they have no food at home. Thats the front. On your back, people look over your shoulder, commenting your food. Some of them are trying to sniff a breeze.
Lets come to the food. The so called culinaric highlight.
If this pigswill that i have seen there in the last 5 years is a culinaric highlight, Ludwigshafen, Germany, 20km northwards (with the BASF, the largest chemical factory in the world) is a climatic health spa.
This was by far the most annoying pigswill that I have ever had. And I have eaten a lot of worse stuff. Believe me.
I was damn f...... hungry, and when I am hungry, I don`t care about taste.
I have seen about 300 soccer games in the stadium and compared with every single meal I have had on this "culinaric highlight" in the last years, each sausage served with a piece of 2 day old bread was a fried poem. Take Burger King, Mc Donald, KFC, Pizza Hut and let them cook the food. I am not only outraged about that, I am really pissed
I mean, I don`t believe that there is anybody in this whole bureaucratic officialdom thinking with a brain. These high born, blue blooded, office chair farting god like creatures just seem to care about illusion. Reality doesn`t count anything no more. It`s about illusion, thats it.
Why organize something, trying to get cooks (that can cook) and drinkable wine? Lets just name it "culinaric highlight" and sell convenience pigswill. You want an example? Ok.
Cheese Noodles (Käsespätzle)
What are cheese noodles? Right. Noogles with cheese. Easy to make.
Cook noodles, add raw onions and cheese. Put in frypan. Finished.
Bacon dumplings (Speckknödel)
Order dumplings with bacon. Hold warm. Finished.
Beef broth (Rindsuppe)
Cook water, add instant soup. Finished.
Tarte flambee (Flammkuchen)
Order 1000 pieces. Warm up. Finished.
Pork loin (Schweinelende)
Cook 1000 portions. Hold warm from 10 a.m. to 9 p.m.
etc. etc.
So, whats left? Right. Didn`t lose a word about wine.
It is a god damn shame which kind of wine is served. You want to give this to the emperor? You shure? Should I tell you what have happened, if someone would have had the nerves to dish up - I have to say it once again - pigswill like that, on a landgraves table, or on the table of some duke, four quarters of your body would have been ended up tied to a horse.
Today, Conrad II. would come to Speyer, the first thing he would take would be the mayor of Speyer, he would let his dudes build a nice cage and after breaking each bone of his body, this cage would be placed on some junction for the next decades, to let the people see what happens if there is pigswill served on an emperors table.
Advice from me when getting to Speyer:
Eat in Heidelberg.
